My favorite love songs..

..feel free to dedicate some to the lovely people in your life :)

~Reminds Me of You - Day 26

~ Can't Live If Living Is Without You - Mariah Carey

~ I Want To Know What Love Is - Mariah Carey

~Worth It - Whitney Houston

~ I Turn To You - Christina Aguilera

~Why I Love You So Much - Monica

~You're My Rock - Beyonce

~ Waiting - Beyonce

~ When Love Takes Over - Kelly Rowland

~I Just Can't Stop Loving You - Michael Jackson (RIP)

~Heaven Chose You - R.Kelly

~If This Isn't Love - Jennifer Hudson

~Brown Eyes - Destiny's Child

~ I'm In Love - Lionel Richie

XO

If I know what love is,its cause of You

Wrote this a few years ago,no it wasn't dedicated to anyone and that's the beauty of it,otherwise I think I would have deleted it by now.So here's to love..

A love so rare!
A strange love
Where we haven’t met physically
But through the thousand miles
Our hearts bond together
And dance to the rhythm of love.

A strange love
Where people tell us we can’t be
But our hearts have gone too far
To be stopped or held back.

A strange love
Where a special bond
Brings us together
From two opposite parts of the world
From a thousand miles apart
And our hearts dance to the rhythm of love

A strange love
Only we can understand
Only we can see its beauty
Only we can speak about it

A strange love
That will overcome all hardships
That will stand the test of time
That will bring us close each day
That will cover the thousand miles and bring us near
That will make us dance to the rhythm of love

A strange love
Which is never strange to us but to others
Which will bring me into your arms
Which will prove we’re for real and not just playing around
Which will again bond our hearts together, body and soul.
-Samira Sanusi ©

The Month of Love

Yaaay my month is here.Since I am "Sucker For Love" its only fair that I make February my month for obvious reasons.Valentine's Day!! I never had a boyfriend during Vals,and now that I do I find myself being indifferent about the whole thing,ain't that a bitch?! But,I'm still excited about vals because I want to write special notes this year to the amazing people in my life.Some might even get gifts,I plan on getting my dad flowers,he's the only guy I know that is obsessed with flowers.I also want to write some love poems,haven't done that in a long time! And I'm looking forward to getting sick from all the heart shaped chocolates in the shops.They're every-freaking-where and they're so tempting.I have eaten dozens already and it's not even February yet! I might also go to one of those Valentine's Day parties where everyone wears red or pink..Haha!


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..And to those who have been wondering where I’ve been..I’m so effing bored! Why does everyone think I’m chilling anyway? Just cause I’m not in school and I’m not working don’t mean I’m chilling.Yes I have lots of free time to sleep,watch series,hang out with friends and go to the mall just to buy a new lipstick cuz I couldn’t find the old one don’t mean I’m chilling.It’s the kind of life lots of people want,especially those who are neck deep and buried with school work or office work but believe me too much of everything is not nice.A little break once in a while is nice,after a long hard day,or weeks/months of school work,projects,tests and exams or a year of working from morning till in the P.M.But once that break stretches for a while you start to run out of things to do,places to go to,people to see and even what to eat or drink.Today I woke up with nothing to do but go to the mall and buy another Chanel lipstick..Yeah I’m that bored,and no I ain’t chilling!

..Am I the only one who thinks it’s going to keep snowing till March or April? It’s sunny sometimes but it doesn’t change the fact that its still sooo cold.And just when the snow is all dried up you wake up in the morning to meet another heavy one.I’m tired of being cold,tired of slipping on the ice,and tired of wearing those heavy coats.I hate boots now too!Speaking of boots,I ran out of shoe spray so I used my Victoria’s Secret body splash for my shoe,hehe..I ain’t stepping out with dirty and ashy looking shoes,nope! Anyhoo I’m going back into hiding,to counting down to the sunny and warm days.I still love you snow,and I still smile when I see you because of how beautiful you look when you fall but damn,you gotta go!

On friendship

Probably everyone I know has been on the friendship roller coaster where you get to a point in your life and you start to question everyone who’s in your life.I just came out of that phase,it wasn’t fun,I had a lot of thinking and analyzing to do,I also had to observe myself and the people I keep around me,but in the end it was worth it.I used to be online on Yahoo,MSN and Skype messengers 24/7,chatting like there was no tomorrow.All of it was fun,and I didn’t mind doing it even when people claimed I did it cause I had no life.It made me happy to sit and chat so I sat and chat.And then there was Facebook,again I was on that thing all day all night..I’ll update my status every hour like its my diary,change my profile picture 3 or 4 times in a day and lose sleep because I was on Facebook.Sometimes when I slept I’d wake up and hit F5 to refresh the homepage and see what’s new on FB and then go back to sleep.My addiction was that bad that my friends started calling me Lord Facebook and other names.But at some point I just had to quit it all.I had to quit sitting in front of the computer all day and night,chatting with people.I had to quit uploading pictures on Facebook or updating my status.I had to quit putting my life out there like that.I hate drama and I hate people being in my business so I had to stop feeding it to them even.A lot of the people I called friends had to be let go of because I had to start taking care of myself.

 

It wasn’t because I stopped loving them or because we were no longer friends.I needed time to think and figure things out.I needed to know if there was any such thing as a “best friend” or a “BFF”. I needed to know who had my back,who didn’t and who always will.I had to find out which of my friends will come looking for me when I walked away,and which of them will be like “screw her!” It’s almost impossible to have someone love or cherish you back the way you love and cherish them.Yes they’ll love you and do anything for you but the way you hold people in your heart isn’t necessarily going to be the same way the hold you in theirs.It took me a while to realize that fact. I also learnt that childhood friends sometimes have to be left in the past. Just because a friend had my back when we were young doesn’t mean they would do the same for me again tomorrow.Things change,people change.Nothing really stays the same.I had to stop trying to fix every friendship that started ages ago.I get jealous when I see really close friends that go way back,it’s nice to have friends that have been with you for years and everything is still going strong,but I didn’t think it was wise to keep fighting for something or someone that wasn’t worth it just because I want one of those friendships where I can say “we go way back” and smile. A friend might be there for you today but let you down tomorrow. I had to learn to always remember the good times and the times when they were there for me and leave it at that. Trying to decide who was the best friend or the BFF was just too much work and exhausting.I realized everyone was going to hurt me or let me down at some point,I just had to figure out what to accept and forgive and eliminate the rest.

I had to stop fighting for people that wouldn’t fight for me.And I had to figure out who and who was worth fighting for.At a point I kind of ditched and let go of everyone,including those I loved and didn’t want to lose.That was my way of figuring out if they would really follow me or let me go.

The drama ones had to be totally cut off..as well as the negative ones.Why do we have to sit and gossip about other people anyway? Who cares what designer handbag she’s wearing or what girl he’s dating? Why did the discussion always have to be about other people and what they were up to.Why not about us? About our dreams,our future,our plans and whatever it was that kept us going? It was time to grow up and move on and I couldn’t let anyone hold me back,no matter how much I loved them. If you bring drama and stress into my life I’ll show you the way out cause I’m so over that.It was entertaining when we were younger but not anymore.

So next time you want to ask me why I walked away,know that you didn’t give me any reason to stay.Like I said,I only fight for those who’re willing to fight for me.

Amina-Girl with the beautiful voice

I have a friend called Amina Abdul-Hamid and she’s a real sweety.I’m not saying this because she’s my friend,I’m saying it cause it’s true.She’s outspoken,honest,down-to-earth and fun! She’s someone I’m glad to have in my life and glad to call a friend.Someone I can always count on to lift me up when I’m done.Oh and we share the same passion in Belgian Waffles,Häagen dasz and anything yummy :)

Amina is a also a singer and song writer.Its one mad talent she has.I try to remind her how great she is and how I think she’s an awesome singer.You gotta watch her clips to know what I’m talking about.I know lots of people,including myself who claim they can sing..Hehe..Sure we can all sing,in the bathroom though.But it takes talent to be able to hold a note or sing acapella.

Visit her Youtube page and listen to more of her http://www.youtube.com/user/minoxus

Visit her blog at http://meenahdee.blogspot.com

HAPPY New Year

The first time I was ever happy in my life was in 2009.I still don't know what it was that made me happy inside but I knew I was happy.The feelings of sadness,depression and loneliness were replaced with hope,happiness and a positive attitude.All of a sudden I didn't feel the need to go shopping every week just to smile.I went to the mall to hang out and other stuff but didn't get anything for myself.I even went to buy a few things for my loved ones but surprisingly I got nada for me.The old Samush would NEVER do that. I'm happy that I'm happy and I hope I continue to be happy because I know I deserve to be happy.Ok too many "happy" in this sentence but you understand what I mean right? With everything I've been through I just want to be able to smile because I want to smile not because I'm trying to hide the pain in my eyes and the hurt in my chest.I want to go shopping because I need something from the shop not because I depend on shopping to make me happy.

Last night,New Years Eve was overwhelming for me.I was going through so many emotions I didn't know what to do.First I was happy and excited about the new year,then I was upset and I still don't know why I was.Maybe it's because the year I found happiness in was ending and I didn't know what the new year will be like.Maybe I'm scared the happiness I found will slip through my fingers and I'll go back to how I used to be.I always look happy,but the problem is I'm not always happy,I'm always struggling inside and I have battles to fight that are way beyond my maturity level.

Regardless of how I feel or what I think about this new year and the future,I'll try to continue to be happy,stay positive,smile and hope/pray that this year will be good or even better than the last one.

Now I know what the "happy" in happy new year stands for.We all want to be happy,and it sucks to not be happy,it sucks even more to be happy but be scared that everything might change in the split of a second.I'm not letting this happiness go,I deserve it! X

P.S: 2010-Are we calling it two thousand and ten or twenty-ten? :S